71 / The Dark Guest

This Dark Guest.  This Hidden Passenger.

O Lord, in misguided, fleshly repentance, I would pray this:
“Bend my hands or even cut them off…”

These hands

• These hands
  • Hands that should embrace you by faith,
    yet how often they have struck you
• These hands
  • Curled in fists
    hatefully driven by my wayward will
• And My eye
  • My eye has a hidden desire to seek my fame in all I do;
    to see my name in lights
• And My heart
  • My heart sinfully worships created glory, worldly honor,
    human wisdom, and the esteem of men

But to pray that you should cut these things away?
This is law not grace.
So, my repentance must grow deeper, it must have a greater goal

So, Help me not only speak the phrase “I am sinful”
but to see the sin itself – the Dark Guest, the Hidden Passenger
Help me to view my undiscovered sinfulness
Help me to know that, though my sins are crucified,
they are never fully killed

That is why I need You ever still

The Dark Guest, the Hidden Passenger – My Sins

• They live. They breathe…
• hidden in the recesses of my sinful heart
• Hatred,
• Malice,
• Ill-will,
• Self-glory – that hungers for man’s approval
  and hunts for man’s applause
• All Crucified. All Forgiven
• Yet they live, they breathe,
  longing to rise again in my sinful heart

That is why I need You ever still

O my Dark Guest.  My sinful heart! Crucified, but never fully killed!

• O my life-long damage,
• O my daily shame
• O my sin!
• Ever indwelling, ever besetting
• O the tormenting slavery of my addicted flesh
• O that Dark Guest within,
• Living, breathing,
  longing to make a home in the recesses of my heart

That is why I need You ever still

For You have not left me here without your Grace;
O Spirit of Christ, destroy this Dark Guest within,
whose hidden, lurking presence makes my life a living hell
Let the Cross stand to meet my needs,
penetrating deep beneath, in the darkness of my soul

I thank you that you help me to remember You
For to remember my sins
causes me to also remember Your Cross
The awareness of my sin
drives me once again to the comfort of Your Love
So then also bring into my mind the remembrance

• of your help,
• of your support from heaven,
• of your great grace that saves a wretch like me

There is no treasure so great as Your Cross,
There is no gift so great as Your Grace toward me
Only Your Grace and Your presence alone
can subdue the Dark Guest within

That is why I need You ever still

Now, as repentance matures, I pray –
Give me only You, and then all else –
– hands,
– eyes,
– heart,
all will be at rest.

Dream Your dream within me Christ,
and Captivate my wayward will.
Crucify my nightmare flesh
and mortify all other dreaming idols…

Slay my Dark Guest

• So that You might Live,
  • and You might Breathe,
    • as the only Living Treasure left
      • within my Captive Heart